Today, like the last 5 days, started with melancholy. Gloomy, cold, GRAY, and sad.
You see, a close friend of mine named Scot passed away last week, and grief was completely governing my mood for more consecutive days than I have ever remembered in my life. The day started with chaos as usual; the middle school bus never showed up, my daughter was coughing so badly, I hated to send her to school, my son wouldn't let the chickens out of the coop, no lunch money for the kids, forgotton Swine Flu shot permission slips...etc...
So I drove my kids to school, picked up a very expensive, highly caloric coffee drink with an extra shot of espresso and came home to an empty, albeit NOT tranquil house. The dishes from my husband making scrambled eggs and blueberry/banana pancakes were stacked all over the kitchen, milk was on table, scrambled eggs were on the floor?, there were clothes all over the the laundry room and bathroom, the straightener was left on, the bathroom, basement, and living room were sosooooosoooo messy. And to top it off, I walked around the house to find 24 candy wrappers; on the floor, on the office desk, in drawers??, under the beds, behind the toilet?? Really? The more empty wrappers I found, the more enraged I became. Then. I couldn't find my favorite scissors, ANYWHERE. or any scissors out of our 19 pair for that matter. And then I glanced at my TO DO LIST....for opening my restaurant. I am on task number 6 out of about 189.......... I just wasn't sure how doing anything would make a difference.
As I was about to subtly weep, the weirdest thing happened. THE SUN CAME OUT. Before I even saw it, I felt it....on my cheeks, in my smile, in my attitude, and on my outlook and thoughts for the day. I immediately looked up (this was when I was picking the candy wrapper up from behind the toilet), and started singing (out loud, as I frequently do)..."Here comes the sun, here comes the sun, and I say it's all right....Little Darling, it feels like years since it's been here.....it seems like years since it's been clear, and I say it's all right......it's all right" Jumbled lyrics, I'm sure, but mood altering, just the same. At that moment, I walked around, and nothing really bothered me.....I was grateful that we had fresh blueberries for the pancakes, and grateful that we could afford nice clothes, even though they were all over the floor, and I was grateful that I had daughters that could use my straightener, and grateful to have a son who sasses back all the time, (a temporary phase....everyone assures me) and I was actually grateful for the chickens that my husband wanted, as I saw the beautiful, brown eggs on the dirty counter.
I also came to realize that one day in my life, there will be no wrappers on my floors. I need to also add that Matthew Sweet's Divine Intervention was now playing loudly on my stereo. Coincidence? Not sure. So, I'm left to wonder....was it Divine Intervention? Scot perhaps? or The Power of the Sun? Or....maybe, just maybe, they are all in this together.